What Are Some Church Offering Jokes?

Some church offering jokes are “Country Church Stewardship” and a joke about Mary’s birthday gift. Another joke tells the story about little Johnny buying candy with his offering money.

“Country Church Stewardship” tells the story of a minister in a country church that struggles to raise sufficient funds for the church. One service, before passing the offering plate, the pastor gives specific instructions. He tells the congregation that the person who steals eggs doesn’t need to give any money. The pastor explains that God doesn’t want money from a thief. In response, every person in the congregation puts money in the offering plate.

Another church offering joke tells the story about Mary’s birthday. Mary receives $10 from her uncle as a gift for her birthday. The uncle asks Mary what she plans to do with the gift. Mary replies that she plans to put the money in the offering plate at church. She opines that she expects to surprise God, because the gift is not the one dollar that she usually receives from the uncle for her birthday.

In a similar joke, a young child named Johnny goes to the store to buy candy. The store owner chastises Johnny about buying the candy, because he thinks Johnny should give the money to the church. Johnny replies that his plan is to buy candy with his money and that the store owner can give the money to the church.