Web Results


Some witty short sayings are: "Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected?" "Whoever said that nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door" and "Man is the only being who cuts trees, makes paper and writes 'SAVE TREES' on it." These sayings provide chuckles along


A few popular humorous sayings and quotes are, "I'm not lazy, I'm just very relaxed," "It's not important to win, it's important to make the other guy lose" and "The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad!" They are funny because they are often relatable.


Stand-up comedians like George Carlin use personal observation or life experience about a topic to make a funny point and then structure that saying so it starts with a setup that gives context and ends in the punchline that gets the laugh. They also often rely on puns, alliteration, hyperbole and o


Funny quotes and sayings are available on many websites, including FunnyQuotes4U.net, CoolFunnyQuotes.com and Smart-Words.org. Books are also available, such as "The Laugh-A-Day Book of Bloopers, Quotes & Good Clean Jokes," by Jim Kraus, and "Phillips' Book of Great Thoughts and Funny Sayings," by B


Funny sayings for someone turning 50 usually poke fun at the infirmities that come with age. For instance, one popular saying is that by the age of 50 people have their heads together -- but the body has other ideas.


Some funny sayings about best friends include a saying that chocolate makes a friend better and another quote that compares good friendship to an octopus. Another funny saying about best friends comes from the character Winnie-the-Pooh and says that the best friends use simple words. Oprah Winfrey a


Some witty tombstone sayings include “I told you that I was sick!” and “I came into this world without my consent and left in the same manner.” The first saying comes from a tombstone in a Georgia cemetery, and the second is engraved on a tombstone in Tennessee.


One funny quote about babies is "“Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess,” by Lemony Snicket in "Horseradish." Another example is "Babies are such a nice way to start people," by Don Herold.


Some examples of funny sayings to put on bar signs are "Come in and try the worst rum and coke that one guy on Yelp ever had in his life" or "Alcohol and calculus don't mix, so don't drink and derive."


Some funny or witty inspirational sayings include "Each time you open a book and read it, a tree smiles knowing there's life after death," and "Hey you're not happy, but at least you're smart," as listed by The Huffington Post. Some other humorous quotes from Forbes, aimed at inspiring people in lea