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What are some funny missed connections from Craigslist?

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One funny missed connection from Craigslist is a man seeking a woman whom he claims broke wind in front of him at a Trader Joe's. He recalls an exchange where he asked if she was the source of the foul smell and she angrily stormed off after denying it. His missed connections message ends with his declaration that he would love to meet up with her despite her tendencies toward both lies and flatulence.

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Another funny Craigslist missed connection comes from a man reaching out to a woman he saw on Tinder. The man says that he accidentally swiped the wrong way. The humor of the post comes from his detailed and disgusting description of swiping the wrong way due to being distracted by both her beauty and his bodily functions, as he was on the toilet at the time. He describes the shame of swiping the wrong way as causing him to depart the toilet without wiping in search of a cupboard in which he could hide himself.

A morbidly amusing missed connection comes from a man reaching out to a woman he saw at a funeral. Part of the initial humor comes from his generic description of himself as "the one in a dark suit." He describes brushing against her hand and receiving no reaction before describing her beauty. The horrific punchline comes when he hopes that heaven has keyboards so she can write him back, revealing that the titular "lady at the funeral" is actually the woman who passed away.

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