Q:

What are some quick comebacks that will leave your friends speechless?

A:

Quick Answer

A good and quick comeback is one that suits the situation and the people involved. As they might be offensive, make sure to deliver them in a quizzical tone and, if necessary, indicate you were joking.

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Full Answer

A comeback that suits practically any situation is saying "Why don't you go play in traffic?" The act is stupid and dangerous, making it insulting in two ways. Alternatively, change the conversation by asking a friend how old he is. Before he has any time to answer, say that you shouldn't have asked because he can't count that high and apologize. The younger your friend is, the more impact the comeback has.

If a friend tries to make a joke about how you smell, tell him it's how soap smells and that you are not surprised he did not recognize the smell. Even if your friend wanted to joke about your perfume or body spray, this comeback quickly turns his remark into a comeback about how dirty he supposedly is.

When leaving early, turn to your friends and tell them "I'll leave you guys alone, Darwin will take care of you." Darwin is famous for his discoveries in the field of biology. One discovery he's made is that only the best species survive natural selection and the weaker ones die out in time. By referring to Darwin, you effectively call your friends weaklings.

Different people have different tastes of humor. Practice your best judgment when deciding to use a quick comeback.

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