Take ownership of the situation causing you pain to release events from the past, notes Psych Central. This begins by making the conscious decision to let go of the event in question. Without this overt decision, you can undo all the progress you make.
For many people, this conscious beginning comes as a surprise, as they didn't know they had a choice to release the event. After that, it's time to express your pain. This might come in a direct conversation with the person who hurt you, through writing in a journal or just ranting to a close friend or loved one. If you can do this, you have a better sense of what the pain is about, according to Psych Central.
Ironically, having the role of the victim brings a positive feeling, as though it's just you against everyone else. The problem with this is that most people don't care about you as the victim, at least not after a period of time. So, while your experiences and emotions do matter, they're not the only important things in the world. Make the choice to start feeling better by assuming accountability for your happiness. Don't give control of your joy to other people, reports Psych Central.
Remember the difference between forgiving and forgetting. Forgetting what others did is often a naive undertaking, but forgiving what they did means you acknowledge that both of you are good people. Even though the other person hurt you, you are going to progress by letting go of that injury in a tangible way. Doing this is a concrete step toward emotional healing, states Psych Central.