Miss Susie

Miss Lucy (also Miss Suzy, Miss Susie, Miss Molly or Miss Mary) is the name of a schoolyard rhyme in which almost each verse leads up to a rude word or profanity, which then appears at the start of the next verse as part of an innocuous word or phrase. Sometimes various hand signs accompany the song, such as making a phone with one's hand at the "hello operator".


The rhyme is sometimes referenced in popular culture:


Other popular songs and poems employ similar gimmicks for humorous effect:

  • Emilie Autumn's "Miss Lucy Had Some Leeches" is a darker version of the children's rhyme, to the same tune.
  • The folk song "Sweet Violets" ("There once was a farmer who took a young miss / In back of the barn where he gave her a / Lecture...")
  • Various versions of the poem which substitute the name "Suzanne" for "Miss Susie" - ("Suzanne was a lady with plenty of class / Who knocked 'em dead when she wiggled her / Eyes...")
  • Dr. Demento mainstay Benny Bell's 1946 song "Shaving Cream": "I have a sad story to tell you / It may hurt your feelings a bit / Last night when I walked into my bathroom / I stepped in a big pile of / Shaving cream, be nice and clean / Shave everyday and you'll always look keen"
  • Dr. Demento has also played "In my country" as sung by the Lemon Sisters from The Groundlings.
  • Through the mirror on the CD Into the Electric Castle by Ayreon is a dialogue between two warriors sung in similar way.
  • Canadian comedy duo Bowser and Blue included on their first album a Bob Dylan pastiche called "Polka Dot Undies" which subverts the "Miss Susie" structure by repeatedly leading up to a rude rhyme before suddenly veering off, much of the time to the phrase "polka dot undies".
  • There is a similar song in the movie "Hot Chick":

Full Miss Susie Had A Tugboat Rhyme

Miss Susie Had a Tugboat

Miss Susie had a tugboat; the tugboat had a bell (ding ding)

Miss Susie went to heaven and the tugboat went to hell…o operator

Please give me number 9

And if you disconnect me I'll kick you in the behind…the refrigerator, there was a piece of glass

Miss Susie sat upon it and it broke her little ass…k me no more questions, please tell me no more lies

The boys are in the bathroom, zipping up their flies…are in the meadow

The bees are in the park

Miss Susie and her boyfriend are sitting in the D-A-R-K D-A-R-K DARK DARK DARK!

Darker than the ocean, darker than the sea, darker than the underwear my mama puts on ME ME ME!

My mother gave me a nickel; my father gave me a dime. My sister gave me a boyfriend whose name is Frankenstein

He made me do the dishes; he made my scrub the floor. He made me clean his underwear so I kicked him out the DOOR DOOR DOOR.

I kicked him over London, I kicked him over France. I kicked him over Hawaii where he did the hula DANCE DANCE DANCE

My mother is Godzilla, my father is King Kong. My sister is the stupid one who made me sing this SONG SONG SONG!

Note: This is only a version of it. It was said that there were countless variations of this rhyme.

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